“1001 Smartest Things Ever Said,” Edited and with an Introduction by Steven D. Price (the Lyons Press $9.95)

“I quote others only in order the better to express myself.”, so said the late French essayist Michel de Montaigne. Wise, instructive words.

It’s with this quote, placed immediately before the introduction, that Steven Price begins this handy little resource.

Divided into six main sections and an attribution listing at the end, “1001 Smartest Things Ever Said”, gives you a glimpse at the wit and wisdom of man throughout the ages. From Aesop, the Greek of fabled fame to the French novelist Emile Zola.

The sections, “Life and Death (And Some of What Happens in Between)”–yes, that’s the title of the first section; “Love and Friendship; “Success, and Ways to Achieve It”; “The Life of the Mind”; “Politics and Politicians, Government and Statesmen”; and last, “Proverbial Wisdom.”

To say the least, it’s eclectic in both source and content. Yogi Berra and George Will; the Roger’s boys–Will and Roy, Oscar Wilde to Ben Stein. Poets, writers, actors, athletes along with religious leaders and politicians are well represented.

Yes, it’s fun to read, but it’s even better to use what you’ve read. We’ve all heard, “Experience is the best teacher.”, and we know, from experience, it’s true. Years ago, Auguste Rodin (1840-1917), the French sculptor best known for “The Thinker” said, “Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely.” Much the same as the ubiquitous proverb but a bit more eloquent. Using a quote, with attribution, in your writing whether product, content, blog posts or Twitter “tweets” will make you appear more knowledgeable and better informed.

Twitter is arguably the fast growing social media site. Based on observation some of the most “retweeted” material is quotations. Good quotations. Retweets of your posts increases your exposure. Increased exposure gains you more followers.

I’ve enjoyed using “1001 Smartest Things Ever Said” It’s one of the best books I’ve bought this year.

Here’s a final quote that I’m fairly sure isn’t in the book.

“Try it, you’ll like it!”

Just in case you think you had a bad day here’s a true story that I bet you’ll have a hard time topping.

It was about 9:30 this morning as I was driving south on I-275 – which fortunately – was more of a parking lot than a thruway, when to my total and complete amazement I saw a tree frog (you know the kind, greenish-brown, about two and a half inches long with “ET” looking feet and tiny suction cup toes) clinging tenaciously to the inside of my drivers side window.

Being the nice guy I am I figured I’d let him out of my truck so he or she (who would know except another frog) could continue with life in the great outdoors. I began to slowly lower my newly repaired (but that’s another, not to mention expensive, story) power window. Having dropped the window far enough for my uninvited guest to depart I decided to gently encourage him when he showed no incentive to leave on his own.

Big, Big, Big Mistake!!!

You would think this slimy amphibian would be appreciative of my kindness. Not so.

Immediately upon touching him ever so gently to move him toward the opening he turned on me.

With what I am sure was utter and complete malice he leaped straight at my throat, peeing all the way. He must have needed a rest stop for quite some time based on the volume of his output.

After barely avoiding a ten-mile an hour accident, that I’m certain would have gotten me a ticket, (Can’t you just see the cop listening to this story?, ”Honest officer, it was all the frog’s fault.”) I grabbed a tissue and wiped-off my hand, pants leg, shirt and door panel.

Having adequately recovered I started looking for the frog. He had disappeared. A few minutes and maybe a half-mile down the road he reappeared. The malicious mutant ninja frog was sitting on my console taunting me and daring me to touch him. I’m a slow learner. I grabbed a tissue and attempted to grab the frog. After turning the tissue into toilet paper he jumped on to the dashboard and then leapt to the passenger-side window glaring and pissing all the way.

I quickly lowered the passenger window and the little ingrate jumped to the outside rear view mirror. I quickly powered the window up. He immediately stuck himself to the outside of the glass and glared at me all the time moving his little frog-lips angrily. I’m not sure of what he was saying to me but I suspect if I took a guess and put it in this email your spam filters would reject it.

After a few minutes he finally got tired and left.

I hope a semi ran over him.

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Note: I wrote this little tale in the spring of 2006. Due to subsequent HD crash I don’t recall the date. As with all original content published on elmerhurlstone.com “The Tree Frog and Me” is copyrighted by Elmer Hurlstone. All rights are reserved.